my beliefs
spirituality, to me, has nothing to do with the word “religion”. I’m personally not one who buys into organized religion and i know it bothers some people that I do not call myself a label as “Christian”, etc. and unfortunately those who want to judge me for that are the very ones I want to stay away from. the ideals behind spirituality for me are that we are all here to love one another, support one another, to believe in the power that each and every one of us have – and THAT force that is created by that love, THAT energy, is what makes the world keep going. I DO believe in the concept of karma – that the good we create in the world lives on and comes back to either supplement – or haunt – us during and after our physical shells have enjoyed their stay on this planet.
i’ll add more to this page in the form of links to information as i find it and experience it as this journey is still relatively new to me, but i can tell you that as i have paid more attention to what this concept really means to me, the changes that have happened in my life have been magnificent. things have happened for me that i had only dreamed about, and i must pay attention to that with everything i can muster.
*2017 “update”
Well as one would have it I come to 2017, 2 & 1/2 years later to update this page and find that the project I speak of on this page DID in fact get a good start. The project is the album “Worth The Wait”, and has since had 2 single releases, actually 3 since one was a bonus of sorts, and is still in production, using the lessons learned. All 3 songs, “No, Father” (which was the debut single in May of 2015), “It’s Alright”) in demo form and a bonus remixed and remastered version of “I Wish You Christmas” are all available through streaming services online.
My views on spirituality keep being aligned and realigned and have taken sharper form and imagery as life has brought losses and gains, but that is to be expected as one lives out their lives. I’ll be updating with video blogging on my YouTube channel as well. And as always, thanks for reading.
So this morning I’m sitting here drinking my morning coffee and having my smokes in the garage, pretty much my ritual when I get up and get going. I have a normal Friday ahead with DJ’ing this afternoon and a little additional work beforehand in continuing to organize the booth. It’s yet another part of what I like to do, and I always look forward to my Friday afternoons at The Bear.
What’s weighing on my mind this morning is the thought and realization that I am feeling a little “disappointed” in myself. That might not be the right word, really, as I know I have grown by huge leaps and bounds over the last several years, especially the last year. The road I’m on, the path I’ve been taking, is wonderful and I want to stay on it.
But what I’m finding is that “enlightenment”, in the form I feel it, and the mindset that I want it to be in, is really difficult to maintain. It’s not impossible, but it’s an ongoing lesson. It’s an ever-evolving state of being that must be nurtured, cared for and paid attention to just like any living breathing being. I find myself very easily swayed to either side of the path; it’s easier to walk in the grass, the cushier, more comfortable side, the things I sink into, old habits, because they’re what I’ve known, whether they’re having a drink too many, exercise not done, or just a tendency towards laziness. Walking on the newer path, the road less traveled and etching out the unseen to see what it will take me and what I can discover that is new and exciting – and even more, what it can bring to further enrich this life – is where I SHOULD be heading – yet as much as I WANT to do it, I find that the human side of me tends to still want those creature comforts that got me into trouble in the first place.
Maybe it’s because I spent years wallowing in the veil of darkness that those days brought to me; that false sense of safety and security that I had convinced myself was my reality and therefor WAS my reality, and that I spent a damn lifetime climbing out of. I simply cannot ever go back to that again.I will not. I have stated before how I’m finding it difficult to adjust to the man I envision myself to be, and the man I truly feel I am in my heart and mind, especially when I know outside influences can quickly affect that.
It’s something I must work on as I enter into what has to be the most productive and creative period of my life – as well the most raw and exposed I have ever been to others, and the world. This project I’m working on will be out there for the world to see, and I just can’t accept failure or anything other than total cohesion to what I’m representing as *me*. All must be aligned. It is the paramount goal of my being at this time, and I must attend to it.
We are constantly learning. You cannot ever, ever stop.